You think your life is confusing?
by ThanksForNothing
Summary: So you think your life is confusing? This is the story of Helena and how falling for the wrong person can change your life in ways you never wanted it to.
1. Chapter 1

**Some of you may have read this, that's because I wrote this about 5months ao and took it down because I didn't like it at the time, but now I'm going to continue it. I havve the first three chaps from last time. pl read/review!**

The 9 am bell has just gone, great, just fucking awesome. It's the start of a New Year 'welcome to 2008'. Ugh. The Christmas holidays have ended and it's back to work. Sometimes I friggin hate life. The jocks all have new jackets and are already trying to show them off to Britney and her friends. Britney is in the year above, jocks are always hitting on her because 'she's so hot'. It makes me laugh watching them, they think she's just playing hard to get...yeah right, she's a lesbian. She's going out with one of my best friends Sam. Sam's awesome, she's a lesbian too and has apparently known basically all of her life, she is 16 has short blond hair and plays guitar and of course because she's stick thin and on most of the sports teams she has all the guys trailing after her. Sorry boys she is yet another girl your never gonna get!

I laugh and close my locker door to turn around and see Jason.  
"Hey beautiful" he says in his low masculine voice, it's so seductive when he says it like that and can't help but laugh.  
"Need a cough drop for that voice Hun?" I giggle.  
"Nah I'll be fine, how are you?"  
"Yeah I'm cool, still slightly smashed from last night."  
"Hell yeah, why do they make you start on new year's day, do they not understand that we will still go out on New year's eve and get smashed?!"  
"Obviously not." I replied, seriously this school is mental. "Are Austin and Benny in yet?"  
"Um yeah, they went to homeroom already and I think the rest of the guys are there as well."  
"Shall we?"  
"Lets".

So we get to homeroom in under a minute filling the time talking about Gerard Ways new hair, seriously, I don't know if red was the wisest choice, Jason disagrees.  
"I don't know, I mean he likes to make statements doesn't he, and reds a cool colour."  
"It's not that reds not awesome" I reply "It's just he could have chosen another colour".  
"Like what?" he questioned.  
"Ugh! God I don't know, purple!"  
"Nah, purple he's done I think."  
"Well then pink!"  
"Maybe, that would be interesting, but still nothing wrong with red."  
I let out a long sigh "I give up".  
"Good" Jason laughed, "We're here anyways and it's probably not good to talk about Gerard in front of Benny, remember biology when you hissed his name".  
"God yeah! Austin was so jealous...and a little creeped out."  
"Gerard is good looking and all but Benny is slightly over obsessive." Jason commented remembering Benny's outburst of 'Gerard is so beautiful and his...'.  
"No such thing" I replied and ran into homeroom making well sure to poke my tongue out at Jas on the way.

In homeroom everyone was already crowded round Lindsay and Amelia's desk.  
There was Lindsay, Amelia, Greg, Nate, Benny, Austin and Sam, Jason and I took a seat next to Sam and picked up on the conversation.  
"All I'm saying is that those jocks could have figured out you two were dating by now!" this was addressed to Sam.  
"Yes, but they have about 2 brain cells and I think that they are waaaaaaaaay too obsessed with looking at our legs to notice what we are saying is not what a normal straight girl would say."  
"True, but you do have nice legs". Austin added, Benny nudged him.  
"Hey! Boyfriend in the house!" Austin just looked bemused and turned to Benny.  
"Well first of all you know you don't have to worry because I don't like girls, secondly I love you and thirdly no offence to Sam but I prefer your legs." Benny smiled and looked satisfied.  
"I know but I just love hearing you say it."  
"Yeah and Austin I'm sorry but this is one gal...Your never gonna get!"  
the triumphant look on Benny's face and Sam's reply caused us all to laugh hysterically until Mr. Jackson came in and told us all to sit down so he could take roll.

After roll I had to go to biology and Greg sat next to me so we could plan our joint birthday bash! His birthday is February 9th and mine is the 13th, so we have had a joint party for the last few years and it always turns out awesome! We think we will have like a masked part meets mosh music. Should be fun! It's our sweet 16 party but we don't have too much money to organise it so Greg's older brother's band is going to play for us. They are called 'Midnight Cancer' and they are seriously the MCR of our generation.

I'm slightly worried at this point in time because Benny is humming the tune to 'Gerard is so beautiful and his...' it's slightly creepy, even Mrs. Minny is giving his strange glances, I guess she remembers him standing on the tables and singing...that song. I swear it's an obsession. I wonder if Austin will make him a Gee valentine this year...last year's was awesome! Benny's reaction was even better. He started singing 'I don't love you' but he changed the words from 'I don't love you like I did yesterday' to 'I love you a whole lot more than I did yesterday' which got very strange looks seeing as it was at the 9 am corridor rush and the jocks still got a kick out of the 'fag' joke, it has seriously gone stale. Most of us in the friendship group are at least bi apart from Lindsay and Greg, and they are together, but they still admitted that if they ever felt bi or gay they wouldn't hold it in. We are a very accepting group of people. But there are some people who will not give over.

But that day Austin was particularly pissed off at the joke and started screaming at the jocks about the origins of the word 'faggot' and screamed at them, that if they were too dumb to even know the origins of the word they were using then they shouldn't use it at all. He said a whole lot of stuff about women being 'faggot-collectors' and how faggot was basically a bunch of sticks and how he couldn't see how being gay had anything to do with a bundle of sticks. I love my friends.


	2. Chapter 2

**Lunch-Cafeteria**

I have just sat down and everyone is ogling over Sam's new necklace which she got on New years from her grandparents, they are such rich bitches but the nicest people you will ever meet...weird huh? It's a small silver heart with a small diamond in the middle hanging on a delicate silver chain. It's beautiful and it looks awesome on her, and I'm not the only one who thinks so, but Sam's not really that interested in the conversation her eyes are scanning the cafeteria probably looking for Britney, I don't want to point out that I just spotted her in the hall with Tony, he's captain of the football team at our school and a male model...and let's just say you wouldn't think she was a lesbian by the way she was looking at him. I didn't think it was a good idea to point this out to Sam and Britney probably just feels like she has to go along with it. She is really popular and I don't know how much her friends actually know about her and Sam, to be honest she avoids any real open affection. I can see it hurts Sam sometimes, but what can I do. I just nod at the points where it is necessary, these are pointed out by Benny, actually he kind of elbows me every now and again.

"Hey Helena, is everything alright? You look like you have inhaled too many fumes from the science labs." oh, Austin's so sweet.  
"Oh...no...I'm fine, sorry just wondering what colour scheme Greg and I should use."  
"Black and White" answered Britney coming to sit down next to Sam. Well I guess that matters solved, but I have no idea why every time she enters the room or comes near me I get a certain unease in the pit of my stomach, I'm just being paranoid I guess, but if she's having on my friend I swear to God she will not live to laugh about it with all her hoes.

**P.E.-Gym**

Ugh. I hate PE nowadays. I mean it's so stupid, it's just another way to torture us. I'm running round the athletics track with Amelie and it kills. The track is huge and we have to run around it at least 7 times before we can even think about stopping. Austin and Benny and way ahead and Britney is at cheerleading practice with all her hoes. I don't know what I have against Britney I just don't like her and I don't see that changing. I just realised how many times a day I use that word, I mean seriously, I am such a bitch aren't I?  
"Amelie...do you think I'm a bitch" she takes one look at me,  
"Helena, I think all girls are bitches to some degree, but as far as they go, you are on the minor part of the scale..." we both sow to a walk at the end of our killer run "but...as for that Britney...-"  
"YEAH!...Ooops that was a tad too loud."  
"Just a tad Helena...eh oh well don't worry about it"  
"So you think she's a bitch as well?" hey maybe I'm not the only one who thinks this! This is awesome, a good bitching session is just what I need.  
"Well...to be honest with you..." she lowered her voice to make sure only I could hear it "I'm not sure if she is even Bi-sexual...let alone a lesbian." funny thing is I could see where she was coming from.  
"Do you think Sam suspects anything? I mean, I don't want to see her get hurt." I was genuinely worried too.  
"I just don't know, she could be in denial or she just might not have the slightest idea, but Britney hangs near the jocks so much...and Tony in particular...I wouldn't be surprised if there was some behind the scenes action there as well." she really emphasised the last bit, I gasped.  
"No! You don't think..." no, she wouldn't be that much of a hoe...would she?  
"Well...I'm not sure, but if I hear anything, lets just say she's not taking Sam for a sucker. I mean Sam does like her." Now this was true, Sam near enough loved Britney and i just hoped that Britney realised how lucky she was...

**Science-Last two minutes of the last period**

Just two minutes to go...just two. Seriously is that clock hand even moving?!

_Note from Sam-_

_Hey you okay? You look suicidal!_

_Helena- Yeah I'm fine, just...school you know?_

_Sam- Yeah, I know! It sucks and I have hardly any classes with you or brit._

There goes my stomach again. Why! I decide to ignore it.

_Helena- Yeah I know it sucks, I love you and I hardly see you!_

_Sam- I love you too and I haven't hung out with you for aagggeees! Hey you want to do something after school?_

_Helena- Sure! What did you have in mind?_

_Sam- We could go and watch that new movie called 'Mindless Romance'?_

_Helena- Sounds cool, my parentals are out of town at the moment so I don't even have to check._

_Sam- My dad won't mind, I'm late home usually, on account of hanging with britney._

AAAHHHHHH STOP SAYING, OR WRITING THAT NAME!! I cannot get away from her!

_Helena- Yeah._

**After school- Outside the lockers**

I don't have much homework so I have to dump my books in my locker before I can go to the movies with Sam. Ugh, there is always such a big crush straight after the bell and my locker is on the other side of the room, and on top of that I have to worry about not crushing the ninth graders, you would think that they had a separate locker room, but no! It took a full ten minutes just to dump my stuff and run to the bike stand where I was meeting Sam and of course by this time, bitch monster was there. Ahhh! Can I not spend 2 minutes with Sam without her?!

"Hey Helena!" Sam spotted me in the crowd and beckoned me towards the two of them, great, just what I need. "Britney's going to come with us!"  
"Great..well...I'm not coming, I just remembered I have to help my Mom clean out the garage.  
"Helena, your parents are away...remember?" aw crap.  
"Um...Oh yeah...okay, I just don't want to be a third wheel and i got a lot of homework anyways." With that I turned to walk away, with Sam calling after me;  
"You said you didn't have any." I didn't turn around to answer, I honestly felt like crying. One of my best friends couldn't do anything with me without her girlfriend being there and i knew what that meant. Either that or she would just ignore Sam and that's horrible to watch. I refuse.

So I went home and collapsed on my bed and began to cry...over my friend? This is mental, I called up Jason, I needed to do something to get my mind of of things.

"Jason, want to go out?" blunt question but I thought I might as well skip the formalities.  
"Um...yeah...okay, where do you want to go?"  
"Cinema."  
"Okay, meet you there. Love you"  
"You too"

**Cinema-In the queue**

We had just bought tickets for 'Mindless Romance' and were waiting to go into the cinema when I got a text from Sam.

_"Brit had family emergency, still wanna c movie?"_

I replied;

_"At cinema wid jas, soz. how about 2moz?"_

Then I turned of my phone when we got into the theatre and started talking to jason about nothing in particular. I love how there is no forced conversation between us, we understand each other to not feel the need for it. This didn't go on for too long because the movie started pretty soon after we arrived. The movie was cool but pretty predictable, all was going well, nothing unexpected until three rows ahead and a few seats left I spotted the person that made my stomach protest violently.


	3. Chapter 3

**Cinema-Near end of movie**

Family crisis? Sure looks like it. I cannot believe this!! Actually I can.

"Pssst" I jabbed Jas in the ribs a tad too hard, he let out a small yelp.  
"Yeah...what?" he looked really confused. To clear up any confusion I pointed straight at bitch monster and her mutant. His eyes widened in shock, and his shock turned to horror when the mutant used 'the move' and then they began to make out.  
"Bitch" he muttered. Quick thinking on my part I whipped out my phone and started videoing, this was maybe a tad stalkerish and pervy but this evidence was too good to pass up.  
After about ten seconds I stopped videoing and just in time too because the movie had just ended with the happy couple at the end marrying each other...wow original. The lights came on and Britney was lead out of the theatre by an eager tony.

Jas had his head in his hands and seemed to be muttering to himself.  
"Jas...Jas...Jas...pull yourself together and let's get outta here!" he nodded briefly and then stood, and in the same minute we were walking double pace outside and in the direction of Sam's house.

"No! Wait...where are we going?!"  
"Sam" short, brief, to the point, only we can't!  
"No!" I stopped in the middle of the sidewalk much to the disgust of an old woman on one of those old people motorbikes. Jeez. "No. I can't do that to her."  
"So what's the alternative? Let that whore get away with it and take Sam for a ride!" he was screaming now, and I will admit it was intimidating.  
"She might not even believe us, and then what does that make us look like?!" I had to admit, this was a pretty lame excuse and Jas caught onto it.  
"YOU HAVE IT ON FRIGGIN VIDEO!!" wow.  
"YEAH BUT IT'S NOT OBVIOUS THAT ITS HER!!"

**Sam's house**

Um. So that didn't go well at all. Well she didn't scream at us or anything but she was kinda pissed off. She didn't believe us, and what's worse Britney came and started being all lovey dovey, Sam seemed taken aback by this sudden show of affection. We could so smell the cologne in the room. Me and Jas left after about three seconds of ths. No way could britney be such a bitch!

**The next day at school with Greg**

There had been such big tension between Sam and I today. I would never lie about this, but I had other things to do other than look after her. I had to plan my party with Greg. We had most of the party planned. We were working on the layout of the invite and it seemed awesome. I think this is the final draft we will use;

_February 16th!_  
_Greg and Helena's joint party_  
_Costume (Supernatural/living dead theme)_  
_8-late!_  
_'Midnight Cancer playing'_  
_Greg's house- 2 marmont park_

I mean the words aren't that exiting but the layout sure is! Apart from being a musical genius Greg is also a pretty good artist. So the invitation is on black card with a skeleton hand holding the invite. It looks awesome!

Sam just got up and left the room with a glance at me I could tell she wasn't happy. Great. Austin was just sitting by himself awkwardly shifting papers under my gaze. He and Sam had been talking for at least half and hour, and by the look of it something was up. He hurriedly gathered his things and stood up and quickly exited the room.

Hell no!

"Ok if you've got everything under control, I'm gonna go see what that was all about."  
"MM" he replied before making a noise that resembled a cat being killed with a fork. Weird.

I half ran down the corridor but Austin had done a runner, I did however find Benny at his locker. He had large pink patches around his eyes and dark circles underneath. Seriously, he looked like crap.  
"Wow, man...are you okay?" surprisingly he chuckled.  
"You would have thought I had like been brutally attacked or something." um...  
"Did you get any sleep last night?"  
"Well I was having quite a pleasant dream, but then..." he made a dramatic dumdumdum noise and did jazz hands. I smacked him playfully.  
"Okay! Ouch woman that hurt. Anyways like I was saying I was having a really pleasant dream. Then I was on a farm only I wasn't me..." he looked slightly embaressed but this time he needed no prompting "I was like a piece of meat."

Okaaay. He got no sleep because of meat dreams?

"But it gets worse. Like this chicken starts chasing me and pecking at my fat it really hurt as well and then when I woke up I felt really sick and then I threw up my steak...I think it was a sign." I raised my eyebrows at him.  
"Yeah, meat dreams! OMG it's a sign!!" He scowled.  
"Well anyways now I'm veggie." I lightened up at this.  
"YAY! Me too!"  
"Yeah but hells you have been a veggie forever!"  
"So...have you seen Austin?"

"Yep he said if you asked for him, I was to point you in the wrong direction. He went that way" he indicated towards the science block.  
"Wait. How do I know you're not lying?"  
"You don't. You'll just have to trust me."

_**Hey everyone! Sorry this took a while, but this is all necessary for the story and I'm really tired at the moment. I don't really have much work at school even though it's GCSE year all my coursework is in effect next year asides English, I am just by nature lazy! Lol. Okay well I have most of this planned but if you have any ideas, character ideas just message me or say in a review! Pls review!**_

_**Also I am short of good fics so if you have one that you think I will enjoy pls send!**_

_**xxxNevergonnagetmexxx**_


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